Okay, first off, don't think it's as simple as just putting a snake into a bottle of rice wine. You've got to gut the snake first (but don't forget, the heart goes back into the bottle, not in the scrap bucket).
See:
Two notes about the video:
1.) It creeped me the fuck out.
2.) I found it by typing in to google, I swear to god, "snake wine what the fuck".
Apparently this very, very manly intoxicant isn't just for looks; drinking it supposedly helps cure everything from diabetes to down syndrome (that's in addition to increasing your sexual prowess- because seriously, it wouldn't be a weird Asian custom if it didn't, now would it?).
But who cares why anyone would make it, the real question is how does it taste?
"It would best be described as a combination of Japanese Sake and cheap tequila with subtle tones of formaldehyde and fish jerky."
Another taster described it as:
"The taste was mysteriously bland, like licking envelope flaps or stamps. Oh, and the bottle I bought listed "ethanol" as its main ingredient."
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Personally, I give the first description much more merit; any bottle of snake wine with a list of ingredients is definitely not the real deal. Plus the second quote came from a guy who writes for The Washington Post, and you'd have to be some kind of pussy to write for the The Washington Post.
Apparently the more poisonous the snake, the more badass the wine is (don't worry, the poison is broken down chemically by the alcohol).
Here's the best part of snake wine- you never run out; once you drink the bottle down you're supposed to just put more rice wine in and let it age a few months. BAM! More snake wine. It's like what Jesus did with the fish and the loaves of bread.
But, if you're re-using one bottle for an extended period of time, be careful. If you shake the bottle, the dead, gutless reptile you're storing in a bottle of something you plan on later drinking will shed its scales. And that would be gross.
41 comments:
that blog was f-ing incredible
This might be the best post EVER; the only way to improve it would be to obtain some snake wine and write a first-person account.
I'm not sure on the legality of the real stuff; apparently there's some issues with the treatment of the snakes when cobras are used.
Plus it's not like this stuff is mass produced. It can be found on ebay, but I suspect it's the ninny version the washington post guy tried (he bought his in an airport of all places).
And seriously, I'm a picky eater- there's no way I'm drinking rot-gut with a side of snake.
alcohol kills germs
I don't know, I think it sounds pretty good. And I really like that it's snake wine and not, like, snake tequila or something. Because wine is more classy.
And so what if a few scales fall off? Scales in snake wine are like the ice in a Sonic fountain drink. It's not just utilitarian--it's delicious!
Echoes is somewhere puking his guts out right now.
well, without his guts we can make slogan echoes wine (assuming we can find a bottle big enough, and that Moronica will let us borrow enough wine from his stash to fill it).
FUCK THAT SHIT!!!
I swear to FUCK that is the most disgusting shit I've ever seen.
Shame on the degenerate fucks who came up with this and shame on all of you.
FUCK!
I have no problem with any of this.
but really Babbles?
writing anonymous comments sucking off your own post?
LIsten, I have not done that (on this post).
Also, I hired Vinnie Van Lowe to go snooping around to see where your missing submit button ended up...
I found Cisco Red within hours of being told it existed.
I'll find Snake Wine.
My boss, in response to this post:
"That's disgusting. 'Hey guys! Let's get some roadkill, dump a little rubbing alcohol on it and suck its butt!'"
would your boss really use the correct "its"??
Probably. He's pretty smart.
Also: I like that snake wine cures the diabeetus. Wilford Brimley will be happy to hear of this.
I'm just happy to hear the name "Wilford Brimley".
I'd like to see him gutted.
Wilford Brimley wine! For some reason I suspect the hangover would be monstrous.
Also: I wonder how many Thai kids are out there doing the good deed of getting their down syndrome friends/relatives puking drunk on snake wine. You know, to "cure" them.
By the way, Echoes, that's not the most disgusting shit ever seen.
This is.
I didn't click on that video, ave, but the label says it's the seattle horse death video... Is it?
And molly, I think I read some stuff wrong- turns out snake wine doesn't cure down syndrome, it gives it to you.
It most certainly is.
You know there's a documentary about that farm? It's slated for release this Spring.
I've got my ticket.
In my mind, putting parts of a snake in your mouth is depraved to a degree that cannot be matched.
2 Girls, One fucked to death by a mule with flesh-eating virus of the cock... What have you.
Still pales in comparison.
I'm sorry, but the idea of horse cock tearing my colon to shreds (and sending me to an early death via internal bleeding) is way more repulsive than anything you can ever put in my mouth. . . including horse cock.
the worst part of that video is the sounds the dude makes. Yikes. Or, the worst part is that watching it got me all hot and bothered...
Avenue: Agree to disagree, I guess.
OF COURSE getting fucked to death would be worse.
But, to me, thinking about getting fucked to death isn't as repulsive as thinking about drinking snake.
Probably just me.
I dunno... I watched it, and that guy definitely got horse-fucked, but I'm not sure I'm convinced that he got horse-fucked to death.
For one thing, would anyone be concerned with handling the postcoital horsecock if dude was dead/dying?
This is the grossest conversation I've ever had with myself.
listen molly, do a little research before you nay-say...
http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2002384648_farm16m.html
I'm not saying a dude didn't get fucked to death by a horse. I'm just saying I'm not convinced THIS is video of the now-dead horse fucker.
How 'bout one of you almost-lollers gets out some logic and convinces me?
Molly, you must have either dated some pretty amazing guys in college, or you have a terribly insensitive Ob/Gyn.
Anything that big + Anything going that deep inside of anyone = Death. I haven't seen such depth in anything since I first read Hemmingway.
The guy playing catcher (not to be confused with the horse, pitching) is Kenneth Pinyan, a Boeing Engineer who went under the on-line moniker Mr. Hands. He posted video encounters with equine on the interweb. The video posted here is the most famous. Why? Because he died right after it was filmed. Cause of death: Perforated Colon. He refused to be taken to the hospital out of fear his actions would come to light, and his reputation be destroyed (good thing that didn't happen).
On the plus side, at least the horse came.
I'm realizing you may not be able to view the medscape article since it's a paysite. Here's the text, reprinted wihtout permission:
Colon injury occurs in 2% to 15% of patients having blunt abdominal trauma.[1] Carrillo et al[2] noted that a severe direct force is usually required to produce colon injuries. Most of these injuries are due to motor vehicle collisions (74%), and the incorrect placement of safety belts has been implicated as an additional risk factor. Regardless of restraint usage, associated injuries are common. Possible mechanisms of hollow organ injury from blunt trauma include crush injury between the vertebrae and anterior abdominal wall, tangential tears at relatively fixed points along the bowel, and a sudden increase in intraluminal pressure.[2]
Although not consistent among reported series, colonic injury from blunt trauma appears evenly distributed. Bugis et al,[1] in their study of 16 patients with blunt colon injury, found primarily left-sided injuries; yet, Howell et al[3] reviewed 19 cases and found that the transverse colon was most frequently injured. Hemorrhagic contusion is the most frequent type of injury to the colon, followed by serosal tears, which occur most commonly in the transverse colon. Severe injuries occur more commonly in the sigmoid, right colon, and cecum, where frank rupture or devitalization from vascular compromise may result.
Because of the force required to injure the colon, other intra- and extra-abdominal injuries often coexist. Injury to the transverse colon appears to have more associated injuries than other sites of colon injury. In the series reported by Dauterive et al,[4] the most frequently encountered intra-abdominal injuries involved the liver (64%), spleen (52%), and small bowel mesentery (48%). Involvement of the transverse colon also increased the likelihood of pancreaticoduodenal injuries. The most frequently associated extra-abdominal injuries were skeletal (53%), facial (33%), neurologic (32%), and thoracic (10%).
The importance of physical examination in the diagnosis of colonic perforation cannot be overstated. In 1984, Maull and Reath[5] described 20 patients with hollow visceral injury. All patients who were conscious at the time of admission complained of abdominal pain and/or had signs of peritoneal irritation. The pitfall, of course, is that many injured patients are unresponsive when first encountered, may be affected by alcohol or other drugs, or have sustained a closed head injury, compromising the reliability of their clinical assessment. In such circumstances, further investigation is warranted. Computed tomography and diagnostic peritoneal lavage (DPL) may be helpful in confirming blunt intestinal injury, but both have limitations. Computed tomographic findings of intestinal rupture include pneumoperitoneum (without an intrathoracic source or previous peritoneal lavage); gas in the mesentery, bowel wall, or retroperitoneum; and extraluminal extravasation of contrast material. Other findings suggestive of bowel rupture include thickening of the bowel wall, anterior pararenal fluid, or free intraperitoneal fluid without a known source. Notwithstanding the value of these findings when they are detected, CT is considerably less reliable in detecting hollow organ injury than solid organ injury.
Diagnostic peritoneal lavage done soon after blunt abdominal trauma may also miss a perforated hollow viscus. Presumably, this is related to an initial absence of an inflammatory response. The presence of excessive leukocytes (>500/mm[3]) in the effluent is highly suggestive of bowel injury. The presence of vegetable matter is also suggestive. In a recent report on the utility of DPL, Fang et al[6] described the importance of the cell count ratio. The cell count ratio was defined as the ratio between white blood cell count and red blood cell count in the lavage fluid, divided by the ratio of the same parameters in the peripheral blood. A cell count ratio >/=1 predicted hollow organ perforation with a specificity of 97% and a sensitivity of 100%. Ultrasonography and laparoscopy are additional diagnostic techniques available to the clinician, but both lack the sensitivity to aid in early diagnosis.
Current therapeutic approaches to colon injury are primary repair, primary resection with anastomoses, and repair or resection with diverting colostomy. Exteriorized repair had a period of favor but is no longer in common use. Operative management of colon injury has shifted more toward primary repair. Carillo et al[2] noted no difference in the incidence of abdominal complications after primary anastomoses with or without ostomy formation. Although much has been written on the subject, it is not yet known which risk factors predict suture line failure. However, delay between injury and operation, extensive contamination, associated intra-abdominal injuries, and the presence of hemodynamic instability favor placement of a protective colostomy. Mortality rates from blunt intestinal trauma range from 10% to 30%. The mortality is most closely related to the number and severity of other injuries, not to the specific intestinal injury or its surgical management. However, delay in diagnosis of a perforated colon increases the mortality rate by 25% to 33%.
Reprint Address
Reprint requests to Kimball I. Maull, MD, Carraway Injury Control Institute, 1600 Carraway Blvd, Birmingham, AL 35234.
I've seen some really horrible porn featuring some monstrously huge objects in rectums, where the recipient (presumably) survived just fine.
And while I'm not saying I'm surprised to find out that this particular guy died of horsecockery, I would think it was a little odd that the video of his death was edited postmortem with absolutely no mention of "DEATH OF MR HANDS!!!1!", etc.
I mean, from what the article said the guy's a regular horsefucker. There are multiple videos, right? So what evidence is there that this particular goddamn video is the one where he dies?
Bars, help me out here.
If you watch the video slags, you'll see the horse slip, move forward to catch himself, and hear the man yowl. This seems to be the moment where this nutjob begins his painful journey to meet his maker.
As for why the video doesn't feature on-screen text, or some slide whistle accompaniment on the death thrust - my only argument is that it would be tacky. Maybe his friends had some taste.
In the upcoming documentary Zoo, friends of Mr. Hands talk about who he was, and why he was into this. This is the clip that's shwon and attributed to his death.
Since Molly Skeptical over here can't trust a google search handle, when it screens in the Kansas City-area, a joint venture LL30/2G2BSb movie outing will settle this once and for all.
And by the way Slagster, how did you get access to my video archives? You know I light my own scenes.
ok, ok.
A slide whistle would've been nice though.
How much of Avenue's screen does everyone guess is covered with semen after today's "I know more about horse-fucking than you do" marathon masturbation session?
I'm guessing 67% coverage.
67%? Maybe that was an accurate percentage a few minutes after this post went up.
I've been typing blind for the past day.
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSN2635178620080327
This snake stuff is all over. Rattlesnake vodka in Texas for $23.
Why would you bring up Snake Wine in a forum about Horse Fucking?
You must have Asperger's Syndrome, Anon.
I wasn't grossed out at all in this post until someone brought up Texas... grodey
get these motherfucking snakes out of my motherfucking wine ?
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